Category: Tutti fruiti
Ingredients: 1/2 oz southern comfort, 1/2 oz creme de banana, 1/2 oz blue curacao (Preparation: shake n strain)
History: “You can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes”……..The original song that was written and performed by Carl Perkins in 1955 did in fact refer to a pair of blue suede shoes, but little do people know that when performed by the legendary king of rock n’ roll, Elvis Presley, it was not his dancin’ shoes he was referring to but his favorite shot. Sources very close to the king himself have confirmed that Elvis’s favorite way to unwind after a long night on stage was to go to the nearest tavern and have numerous large glasses of southern comfort and being a southern boy what else would you expect. But the king was getting tired of the same old routine and wanted to take it up a notch. So Elvis asked the bartender one night to create him something special, something with a kick. The bartender who happened to be a big fan knew of the Kings love of oranges and bananas so he quickly darted for his bottle of banana liqueur and blue curaçao. He combined the fruity ingredients with some southern comfort and shook and shook as Elvis twirled on his bar stool in excitement, giggling like a little school girl. The king of rock n’ roll had found his king of cocktails. The bartender named the shot blue suede shoes because it was smooth, blue and also gave u a swift kick up the ass. Elvis laughed …all the way to the bank…the bartender unfortunately not, but he still has his story to tell….well he did, he’s actually dead now.
Category: Tutti Frutti
Ingredients: 1 1/2 oz Jack Daniels, 1 oz Peach schnapps, 2 oz Cranberry juice(Preparation: shake and strain)
History: Long before Jesse James, Billy the Kid and “The Wild Bunch” there was a little known outlaw by the name of Buck F. Tucker. He was mean as a wounded rattle snake and tougher than a two dollar steak. It was told he robbed as many as 250 banks and over a dozen trains throughout his existence, as short lived as it was. He was known throughout the west as a gun toting womanizer that wasn’t afraid to take a duel with any challenger willing to dare. His gun was plated in the same silver he stole from many a train crossing over to the west. He was wanted in more than 16 states on a variety of charges and had one of the largest bounties in history on his head, Dead or Alive. But through all his infamy and all his wrongdoings very few knew that Buck had a softer more sensitive side. See Buck was actually an amateur thespian and enjoyed the theater and fine arts. He would always try to slip in whatever show was in town, dressed up so nobody would recognize( always between robberies of course). He was also a connoisseur of fine cocktails made with only the finest/freshest of ingredients. It was later found through historical records that a barman was given a cocktail recipe by Buck in Tombstone, Arizona about a year before Bucks death. The recipe consisted of a fine blended whisky, the muddled oils of peach skins, the juice of finely ripened red cranberries and a hint of freshly granulated sugar. In 1856 ole Buck was finally caught, tried and hung for his crimes. So in memory of the meanest outlaw to walk the earth with a passion for the arts and the taste buds of a voluptuous showgirl, we bring to you the “Wild, Wild West”!
Category: Tutti fruiti
Ingredients: 1/2 oz crown royal, 1/2 oz apple liqueur, 1/2 oz cranberry (Preparation: shake n strain)
History: Disaster hit Washington in the late 1980’s as their number one export the mighty apple, which happened to be the most sought after apple in the world for its sheer untouchable delicious crisp and juicy qualities, was devastated by a freak brutal crop failure brought on by the notorious Nigerian “Naguyuc” bug. Orchards lay in ruin, ravished by this notorious apple devouring parasite. The apple industry lay in tatters and the majority of apple farmers fled their vast orchards. There was however a man by the name of Christof Guycoogan who saw opportunity while others cut their losses and left their livelihoods in search of the more lucrative hip fruits such as apricots and kumquats. Guycoogan, a carpenter by trade was always a lover of the finer things in life and always cherished his favorite shot after a long day screwing and hammering. His shot of choice consisted of a stiff shot of Canadian whisky and a splash of cranberry. One night after a very lucrative day on the job Christof staggered home from his local bar through an abandoned orchard with a bottle of his favorite whiskey and cranberry concoction in hand. Then completely out of the blue for no reason whatsoever Christof slipped into a large pit of abandoned rotting apples. The juice from the rotting apples spewed everywhere including into his open bottle of whiskey and cranberry. The taste was divine and Christof had a moment of enlightenment, soon he bought up all the abandoned orchards for next to nothing and created more rotten apple juice then you could ever imagine. He then proceeded to ferment the sweet juice into a fine apple liqueur and combined with his favorite whiskey and cranberry concoction Christof created the now famous shot we call the “Washington Apple”. A success story of epic proportions that should inspire all of us to strive to ferment disregarded fruit and combine with juices and alcohol to create delicious shots
Shot of the Week: RJ’s Panty Wetter
Category: Tutti fruiti
Ingredients: 1/2 oz coconut rum, 1/2 oz vodka, 1/2 oz melon liqueur, splash sweet n sour, pineapple, 7up, squeeze lemon and lime, (Preparation: shake n strain into martini glass) – layer 1/4 raspberry liqueur on top.
History: He was a legend, women would go weak at the knees even at a mere glimpse of this strapping stud of a man they called RJ. Built like a brick shit house with piercing blue eyes, a nose that oozed ruggedness and a brace of perfectly symmetrically curved ears, RJ had it all. But even though the entire female population adored him, ironically, this stallion of a man had no interest in women, but instead, his number one passion was his love for the ponies. From an early age RJ longed to acquire his very own stable of fine thoroughbred fillies. He always longed for opening day at the Del Mar races and adored to watch their long legs and perfect muscular behinds. He drooled as one by one these beautiful creatures strutted their stuff and would bustle his way through the large crowds to get as close as possible so he could get a quick feel as they paraded in front of him before a good galloping down the Del Mar turf. But unfortunately RJ realized that his daytime bar tending job was never going to fulfill his ambitious goal of making 50 million dollars to buy all the top-prized racing horses in the land. So RJ reluctantly turned to the adult movie business to help fulfill his dream of building his equine empire. It didn’t take long, his focus, hard work and dedication paid off handsomely and after starring in such classics as Mr. Panty Wetter, The Panty Wetter Diaries and Fifty Shades of Panty Wetting, RJ had amassed the capital he needed. Today, RJ is one of the most successful owner/trainers of his generation and his signature shot RJ’s Panty Wetter is a fan favorite amongst the Del Mar racing faithful. A true success story and inspiration to us all that anything is possible with hard work, focus, dedication and ridiculously good looks.
Category: Creamy N Dreamy
Ingredients: 1/2 oz creme de banana, 1/2 oz Irish cream liqueur, 1/2 oz coconut rum (Preparation: layer)
History: In a river valley in what is now considered upstate New York there lived a peaceful tribe of Indians that were known as the Muhheconneoks translated into “the people of the waters that are never still”. Strategically located next to the river Mahicannituck, the tribe lived a sustained lifestyle with an abundance of natural resources including clean plentiful water, forests as green as an Irish shamrock, and loads of fish and game as seen by no other. They took no more than what was needed and were always sure to replenish for future generations. They were a great people that would dance, sing and tell stories. One story passed down through generations was the tale of a tribal leader known as Chief Amorous. He was a legend in his own right with historical records showing a family tree of 10 wives and 47 children. The colder the winter, the larger the clan in summer. If he wasn’t hunting in the woods he was hunting under the fur covers. He was given the nickname in Indian folklore with the translated name of “the fertile turtle”. So a toast to the legend of Chief Amorous and a shot appropriately named in his honor known as the “Horny Mohican”.
Category: Tutti fruiti
Ingredients: 3/4 oz vodka, 3/4 oz melon liqueur, splash sweet n sour, splash 7up (Preparation: shake n strain)
History: Her name was Delilah Digginbottom and she was the sweetest and most hospitable Southern lady you could ever meet. She lived in a small Kentucky town by the name of Stuffington Commons and her small family bakery “Stuffington Tarts” was located just below the local brothel of the same name. Word has it that after the jaded gentlemen had finished their cavorting upstairs, they would come downstairs to get a second helping of some good old fashioned southern goodness and gobble down on one of her delicious sweet tarts. Delilah’s tarts came in all shapes, sizes, colors and flavors, but a real favorite among her loyal patrons was the tart stacked with plump juicy melons, some lemon and lime zest and a few shots of her home distilled velvety vodka. We toast Delilah for being the inspiration behind the Sweet Tart shot and commend her for such gracious southern hospitality.
Category: Creamy N Dreamy
Ingredients: 3/4 oz vodka, 3/4 oz coffee liqueur, 3/4 oz amaretto, Splash cream(Preparation: shake and strain)
History: Her name was Lola Harris and in the late 70’s she was the queen of the New York club life. When the weekends rolled around she could be seen at the hottest clubs in town. Everyone would clear a path just to watch Luscious Lola strut her stuff. She could be seen doing the Hustle at 12 West and the Bump Dance at Studio 54. She would crank out the Robot at Xenon and work the Bus Stop at Paradise Garage. With a shake of the hip and a click of the heel Lola was hands down the hottest girl around. Lola would march to the beat her own drum. She wore trouser suits in electric blue and hot pants that put a flamingo’s pink to shame. Her hair would be feathered on Friday and Shag by Saturday morn. Nobody could set a fashion trend as quickly as Lola Harris. On a Friday night in mid august 1978 a young bartender by the name of Dirk Diggles had finally came face to face with the queen cozying up to the bar at The Anvil. She ordered a concoction with fine Russian vodka, a Mexican coffee liqueur just hitting the scene, a deliciously sweet Italian delicacy and a splash of cream to top it all off. Shaken well was the only way Lola would have it. It was that night that Dirk created a cocktail to give tribute and praise to New York’s dancing Queen Lola Harris. That cocktail went by the name of Foxy Lady. A toast to Lola, may you forever do, your own Electric Bugaloo!
Category: Creamy N Dreamy
Ingredients: 3/4 oz coconut rum, 3/4 oz melon liqueur, splash cream, splash pineapple (Preparation: shake and strain)
History: Many believe that the delicious and nutritious Scooby Snack shot was named after Shaggy’s treat from the famous 70’s cartoon Scooby Doo, but nothing could be further from the truth. The Scooby Snack was actually named after the renowned Japanese holistic medicine doctor Nishiwaki Scooby. Dr. Scooby is an alternative medicine genius who has cured common disease and ailments with safe natural remedies. His natural cures are disputed highly by the pharmaceutical industry but his patients success rate speaks for itself. Nishiwaki’s main focus is the tremendous health benefits of pineapple, coconut, melon and aged Japanese goats milk. This potent mix combined with his secret distilled grain liquor emphatically boosts the immune system and has incredible healing and ‘feel good’ properties. His natural cures have made the money hungry pharmaceutical giants extremely angry and there has been many attempts on his life, we are not saying by who by the way but join the dots Einstein!!!.. Luckily Dr. Scooby is a martial arts master who trained such greats as Bruce, Brandon and Christopher Lee (not many people realize the latter was a 10th degree black belt who was a world champion in the mid to late 50’s). In fact Nishiwaki has pretty much trained any outstanding martial arts expert who’s last name is “Lee”. With this great combative gift his fearsome fighting skills have thwarted many attempts on his life and long may they last. We greatly appreciate the work you do Dr. Scooby and raise a glass of Scooby goodness in your honor!!!
Category: Wild N Wacky
Ingredients: 1 1/2 oz vodka, 3/4 oz ginger beer, 1/4 oz fresh lime juice and a swift kick in the ass. (Preparation: shake and strain)
History: In 1942 in the midst of the World War Two, a young Russian barman by the name of Taras Titov was struggling to keep his doors open as the residents were fleeing the Nazis who were making their way east plundering town after town for all food, drink and women. The Nazis had just crossed into the neighboring city of Bolshetnitska and all were told to get out if they wanted to live to see another day. Taras , afraid to leave behind all he had worked so hard for, came up with a plan for the invading soldiers. See Taras wasn’t just a bartender, he was a 4th generation mixologist. He would create the finest Russian cocktail the Germans would ever know. A little hint of this and a dash of that and Viola, a mixology masterpiece. On the night of the invasion, Taras had decorated the bar with Nazi flags and propaganda welcoming the Nazis into his establishment. He had the finest Russian cheeses available, the most delectable German chocolate cake and of course several barrels of his delicious concoction. Dozens of Nazi soldiers invading the town came through Tara’s establishment. They would drink and they would drink more until finally Taras’s plan had finally come together. After several hours the soldiers had all become violently ill. One after the other they were dropping like flies purging themselves until they became so weak from dehydration and lack of food that they were barely able to walk nonetheless invade a country. It was told (mainly in Russian Pubs) that here, in the establishment of Taras Titov, that the war against the Nazis had finally changed its course. Taras, it was later told, had one key ingredient that the Germans had never seen coming. In the back of the bar there were stalls where Taras had kept his work mules. The days preceding the invasion Taras had gathered and stored the mule urine into copper troughs and then spruced it up with some sugar, fresh ginger and a bit of fizzy water. Everyone in Russia knows that mule urine is like poison to human beings. Times have indeed changed and though mule urine is no longer an active ingredient Taras’s concoction will forever live on in history as the tyrant toppler baring the name, The Moscow Mule.
Category: Tutti Fruiti
Ingredients: 3/4 oz raspberry liqueur, 3/4 oz vodka, splash sweet n sour, splash 7up (Preparation: shake and strain)
History: Deep in the bowels of the African jungle, embedded snugly in the most southern tip of the Congo, is a small village that prides itself for being the premier producer of the finest raspberries on the continent of Africa. Booray town as its fondly known was actually named after Francois Booray whose family emigrated from France in the late 19th century. The Boorays settled in this quaint jungle village and to give back to the community planted huge crops of delicious wild berries. But unfortunately unbeknownst to the Booray family the Congo is inhabited by the largest population of Gorillas on the planet. Now, what most people do not realize, is that raspberries are actually a Gorillas favorite treat. In fact the mere scent of a raspberry is more intoxicating to a male Gorilla than the scent of a woman, a Gorilla woman that is. Gorillas find human ladies repulsive and despise make-up and high heels (Fact). So year after year the town folk had to fend off these unexpected raids, terrified as these huge monkey munchers swung through the trees, beating their chests, chanting and squealing in ecstasy for the potential of scoring a berry bonanza. That is, until one day when Francois came up with an ingenius idea. His intensive research revealed that Gorillas cannot stand the sound of a hooting horn, seemingly it goes deep into the ear canals causing immense discomfort, discomfort that even outweighed the lust for the luscious plump juicy bulging berries. The town was at peace and still is to this day. The locals christened Mr. Booray “The Purple Hooter” after the color of his face during his relentless blowing, and then came up with a delicious cocktail in his honor, using the lush berries and some other potent alcoholic ingredients. “A la votre” Monsieur Booray, for bringing out the Gorilla in all of us.